But the love remains.

Most of my courses are online this semester, so hopefully I'll have some time for additional online fun, namely, being a little more active here again. I've drawn a lot, but haven't gotten a chance to update anything.

Commissions are still open, and I'm still alive (and happy and productive), I promise.

How have you all been? Tell me of your lives. It might inspire me to reply!

Because holy effing crap Batman, just under 1,000 pageviews until 200,000. I can't believe it. So, yes. Whoever catches that (preferably with a screencap) gets a request from me, because sweet molly malone I never expected to get this far and I truly appreciate every one.



As I'm saying pretty shamelessly everywhere right now, commissions are open. I'll amend that to say that while I'd prefer to do busts or kisses, full body is fine too, we can work something out, not sure why I was like NO before, but why the hell not. Still probably not going to do NSFW things though. I've gotten a couple requests like that, and nope, sorry, you don't want to see me draw dicks, they always come out looking like sad elephants.



And a random-ass feature! Because there are over 4,000 messages in my devwatch and many of them are really really pretty. And I haven't done a feature in a long time and those are pretty nice. I'm trying to be here at least a little more even if I don't have time to forum like I used to. I don't think I could be called a reg anymore, which is a little sad, but. I'm doing things I love, too.

ANYWAY. LOOK AT THESE PRETTY THINGS FOR YOUR EYES:

:thumb345391256:

Why not post about it HERE, on an art site? Yes, yes I will.

Anyway. I'm taking commissions again. Bust portraits and kisses, because they're easy for me and I know I can do them well.

These are examples, and there's more information in the first two description links.



It also goes to my tumblr. Add me if you want; I'm not on it too terribly much. It's mostly fandom crap, and art. Nastiness will be blocked/deleted/reported, as always.

Connecticuit. China.

I... don't know what to say. Not that the Oregon mall shooting wasn't awful, it was, but. This? You don't kill children. You don't hurt little ones, no matter your deranged and inconceivable point.

Shit. Shit.

God, everyone please just try to stay home as much as possible until the year is over. I'm convinced that after it's proven the world is not ending in 2012, this will calm down some, but until then I will be very, very worried for everyone I care about, as well as, obviously, all the innocent people I don't personally know.

I don't know if anywhere is safe now. But try to stay safe.

EDIT: Holy shit, there was a mass shooting at my local mall. I just. Wow. Wow. Thankfully everyone I know there is fine... but there were at least three (some sources say four) dead, and lots wounded.

The shooter wore body armor, carried an assault rifle, and a white Friday the Thirteenth hockey mask. One of those injured might have been the mall Santa.

I wish I were making this up. It sounds like a terrible movie, but. Nope.

I am so convinced he was one of the crazies out now who thinks the world is ending tomorrow or on the 21st. Just another reason to STAY THE FUCK INSIDE those days. Everybody. Just. Stay safe.



# # #

Someone got into one of my email accounts today and changed the password. It was likely just a spammer, but the 'suspicious login' location makes me... well, suspicious. So yes, if you get any nastiness from one of my emails, delete it and change your own passwords just to be safe. It's either a spammer or someone being incredibly immature. Either way, be safe.

That's all. Have an awesome holiday!

Hi guys! I know, I haven't been here in forever. I'm having to balance college with the work I'm doing for Phoenix Online, so fun-times on deviantART often gets left crying on the ground. I'm sorry. :c I miss everyone in Complaints and the Tavern, so please know I haven't forgotten. I'm just busy as hell with, ugh, REAL LIFE stuff, and when I'm not, I'm much more suited to hiding under a mountain of blankets or mindlessly scrolling through tumblr. The love is still here, though.

I've still been doing a little art for myself though, when I can (which isn't often)... mostly Mass Effect RP stuff. Debating whether to put art of really gay salarians up here - but who am I kidding, I think we all know what I'l end up doing.

But, here's the really cool thing I wanted to mention!

The game company I work for, Phoenix Online is putting out a new game! It's called "Cognition," and is an awesome dark noir adventure game, about a kickass lady FBI agent with freaky visions that help her solve crimes and nail bad guys and whatnot. And because it's a Phoenix Online game, there's great writing and classic adventure game humor.

It's the spiritual successor to the classic Sierra game series, "Gabriel Knight" - so if you're a fan, you're gonna love this. I really love this.

And guess what? It's on Steam Greenlight! And this would be ridiculously awesome if it got Greenlighted, for the game and everyone at POS, and me! Because that's where I do things. :3 And it makes my heart happy.

If you're on Steam, please vote for Cognition! I'm really proud of everyones' work on this, and it's a great game too! If you like dark mystery adventure games with awesome art, music and writing (and stuff I'm involved in, and I KNOW you all love me~), help us get this Greenlighted! ♥

Thank you for listening to my spiel. I know it sounds like I'm whoring this out... and I am, because it's my job. But honestly, I'm telling you, even if it weren't I still would, because I love this stuff this much, and it makes me happy to share creative things I work on and like with you guys.

That's all for now! I'll try to have the energy and time to be a little more active later. See you!

So I know I haven't been around in forever, I'm sorry. But there's a good reason for that.

You know how I draw concept art for Phoenix Online, for their game King's Quest: The Silver Lining? Well, another thing I do is voice act and sing, and now write songs. And I've been doing that for them, in their game-universe "radio show," The Hassan and Graham Show.

And now you can see what I've been doing when I'm not here!

THIS IS THE MAIN PAGE (those three buttons are all my art!)

AND THIS IS MY "FEATURED ARTIST" PAGE. With my music! And bio! And face!

You can download my songs there!

"Water Angel" is original/based on the Blackmore's Night song "Loreley," one is a power metal version of "Greensleeves," and "I Will Remember" is an original song written and sung by me.

I really hope you enjoy the songs!

And if you want to leave a comment saying something nice, that would just be amazing. Because if Phoenix Online see that my singing is well-received, we'll probably get to do more! <3 (Any nastiness will be removed by the staff. Just saying.)

I know I have a lot of followers and friends who like my stuff. This is a way you can really help me out, and be generally AWESOME. If you like my music, and especially if you like King's Quest and wonderful adventure games, please check this out!

Instead, everyone should watch this.

[link]

I makes it with loves because I love Motorcity beyond pretty much all fucking reason. Yep.

my cat just died
my mom screamed and i went down and he was gone

she was holding him and he was staring and eyes werent blinking and. yeah. dont ever look into a dead cats eyes okay its. no you dont want to see someone you love like that.

my poor baby

i had him since i was six. i'm 23. 17 years. i iknow he was an old cat but. 17 years.

best friend.

my heart is actually breaking





and here's a stupid drawing i did when i was happy he didn't die three years ago




kittyyyy. ;__;

So, someone illustrated one of my fanfictions. The fic was "Metalhead," a Titan: AE piece about the smarmy, upfucked sexy Preed, and how he got that metal plate in his head. I wrote it around a year ago (and still haven't ENTIRELY finished, there was an epilogue thing I kept meaning to write and still might now that I think about it) - and these THREE illustrations were put up in June, and I somehow didn't see them! I was just randomly dicking around in the TAE group I follow and there they were!

I would have totally pimped them before, if I'd seen them. 'Cause I love 'em. And am flattered as hell a Titan AE fan and artist decided to draw my dysfunctional writing.



And here's Metalhead if you'd like to read it. ... I realize the stigma fanfiction has, but I frankly give less than zero fucks, because I enjoy it, and I like to think my stuff is rather good. Sturgeon's Law and all that.

All riiiight. Always a nice surprise.

So much has happened. Like. A lot. So much that I can barely even think of where to start or how to put it all out. I'll just give the big things, and might add to this as I think of things later. If you stop reading now, just know that I should be around more, because it is now summer. And I don't have six million things demanding my attention and energy right the fuck NOW NOW NOW. I might even be in #TheComplaintsTavern again!

Here's the big thing: I'm now doing concept art for a videogame. This is King's Quest: The Silver Lining by Phoenix Online, what I was working on before - but then I was only drawing and writing things for the extended-universe storyline. Now I'm a concept artist for the actual game proper. Designing and drawing backgrounds and items that will be in the game.

In the game. In the actual game. I've seen WIPs from the 3D art team, turning an environment I drew into 3D. King Graham is going to walk around in environments I draw.



So like. Holy crap. I still can. Not. Believe this. Even if I go on and become a full-time videogame concept artist and make a career of this I WILL NEVER GET USED TO SEEING BELOVED GAME CHARACTERS WALK AROUND IN MY ART. The fact that it's King Graham the first time just... I cried, okay. Realizing what was happening. If you know me, you know I form incredibly strong attachments to characters and universes, and King's Quest was... pretty much the first thing I really loved. So this is just... big for me. It's work and coordination and a little scary if only because I freak myself out about everything and tell myself that getting things wrong/letting the team down is unacceptable, ever. Which is a silly attitude, but one I can't shake. Fortunately the people I work with are wonderful beings.

I'm still going to be doing art, voice acting and songs for the upcoming radio show too - that's just gotten pushed back a bit. Still gonna be really fun.

So that's what I've been doing, mostly. Which is why I've been so absent, and... not really actually uploading shit. It's because the things I'm drawing, I can't share. Which sucks for my dA account, but... is really pretty amazing for me. So instead you get my derpy fanarts I do to relax.

Other things that have been going on:

DONE WITH ANOTHER SEMESTER OF SCHOOL. I turned in an over-100-page portfolio, and have earned the equivalent of around $15,000 so far by doing prior-learning credit-challenge essays. Fuck yeah. Also, $1500 scholarship. Always freaking helpful.

Mass Effect. New favorite fandom. In case you hadn't noticed from what I've been putting up here. Holy shit. Just holy SHIT, man. Since my last journal entry here, I've played all 3 games and shed kind of buckets of tears over Mordin, Thane and Kirrahe. Remember when I said that "Hotel Dusk: Room 215" was the only game to make me cry from a story/character standpoint (not counting pretty music)? That was true... THEN. Now, oh holy crap, just say "Hold The Line" and I start to tear up. I'm not even getting INTO "Scientist Salarian" reprise. It's not even funny. It's sort of worrying. It's normal to want to actually tattoo lines from a game on your skin, right? ... Right?

SUMMER. Today was my first day off. I have been pushing and PUSHING so hard I've made myself sick, and now I just kind of... don't know what to do with myself yet! It takes a long time for me to get used to being on vacation and not in a constant state of GO GO GO GO.

Oh, I got contacts. I like them. My eyes are still getting used to them and I wear glasses a good bit still, but it's really neat to be able to see without them.

What else...

Oh yeah - two agents are still looking at my book manuscript, so. :3 Hopefully that'll go somewhere cool too in the near future. A lot of things are just kind of in-progress right now, and sometimes it drives me nuts that it doesn't move faster, but. Hey. Can't rush the universe. It's summer. I'm gonna relax if it kills me.

You thought I forgot I used to ask my watchers questions, didn't you?

1) Any fun plans for summer break? Or, ah, winter, if you're in the opposite hemisphere?
2) What's a really awesome fandom you've recently fallen in love with?
3) If you got a tattoo, what would it be? ... And where?

Hey guys! As you might know, I currently work as a regular artist for Phoenix Online Studios, a game company that specializes in adventure games, including a continuation of the classic King's Quest series. I absolutely love it; they're a wonderful bunch of people to work with, and consistently give me really fun assignments.

And right now, they're looking for some volunteer 3D environmental artists! That's something I don't have experience in, but I thought some of my friends or watchers might.

If you have any mad 3D skills, head on over here - [link] for the job info. It's not a paid position, but you get hella experience in the game-making industry, learn how it all works, make amazing contacts, and work in a great atmosphere. Plus, as Phoenix is a growing company, you never know if that experience might lead to something bigger.

Plus, you get to work on freakin' awesome games. If you're like me and have any love for King's Quest or adventure games in general, this is definitely worth a look.

Feel free to spread the word, too! If you know anyone with 3D art experience who feels like breaking into the game industry, point 'em this way. I greatly appreciate it too. Thank you guys so much!

EDIT: Here's my Grievances interview! That was pretty fun. [link]

# # #

Remember those black boil pustules of death that were on my face and in my mouth? The dermatologist, in a thinly-veiled "SORRY YOU COULD HAVE DIED, PLEASE DON'T SUE US" move, reimbursed us $242. Which was actually pretty unexpected, and nice. I never expect companies/doctors to actually admit when they've been wrong, but. Hey. Cool.

I'm doing pretty good otherwise. Sorry I haven't been that active here, because school has decided it wants me to die, and likes assigning me multiple 30+ page essays per semester. Plus, I have a lot of art (and writing, and SINGING!) due for Phoenix Online/The Four Winds, which is pretty much priority 1, aside from the shit I actually get graded on.

Happily, for my research paper writing class, I get to write about gay subtext in cartoons. Rather, "Queer Representation in Western Animated Media." Hell yeah. So that'll be fun.

So that's where I've been. Working, overwhelmed, but pretty happy. :3

will be interviewing me this month, so there's that too, which is pretty neat. Still love you guys. Even if I can't be here as much as I'd like to/maybe should.

This morning I woke up, looked in the mirror, and screamed.



There were huge, nightmarish black pustules all over my lips, on my cheeks, and inside my mouth. That's where most of them still are. My parents took me to the emergency room, because that's generally what you do when you look like you've caught the bubonic plague overnight.

It turns out that I had an allergic reaction to some skin meds I was on. The doctor was "stumped" at first, then did a bunch of digging - it turns out that one of the more obscure, rare, WEIRD reactions is blood blisters, and necrosis. Essentially dead spots, like a really low-grade version of the flesh-eating disease.

Pretty cool, huh?

Except it'd be cooler if it weren't on my face and IN MY MOUTH, and looking like I have some kind of leprosy… with a major audition on Wednesday. xD Oh well. I can deal with that! I'm sure it'll be gone by then and if it's not I'll just explain. It'll be cool.

And, fun fact, according to ER doctor, we could hypothetically sue my dermatologist for malpractice, since my dermatologist who prescribed the drug I reacted to actually been informed (by us) that I was allergic to sulfa, and still prescribed a form of sulfa - without telling me. We won't, because who has the time or money necessary (and I really just want to let it go and move on), but. Kind of nice to know we could.

So that's what I did today.



I took my prescription the ER doc gave me, and am going back to bed. Yikes.

As a surprise blessing though, I figured out that if I ever AM in the hospital or something, you guys will definitely know, since I now have someone who I trust with my account, to update shit. That won't HAPPEN, but it's just good to have a plan. :3

Yep. Bed now.

And I am ridiculously happy. It should be a crime to be this happy. Breakin' the , breakin' the ...

I'll update with how it actually goes later, but. Just kind of rolling in all the love over here. <3 You guys are amazing. Rollin' in the loooovvve...

That is all. 23.

I am just kind of absurdly excited.

Hey, lovelies! I'll be in this Friday's episode of Grimm - episode 12, "Last Grimm Standing." 9/8 Central. I've already rambled a good bit about this here and various other places, but just wanted to make another note because it's definitely confirmed for this Friday (the date got pushed back before).

HERE'S THE TRAILER: [link] I'm not in it, but the cage fight is my scene!

I'm a "featured background performer" - look for the screaming feral-creature goth chick in the black tutu and bright red pigtails, all jumpin' up on the fight cage. They said they'll use a good bit of me, and possibly morph my face into a creature, so I'm hoping for that craziness. Also, they had me record some "bloodcurdling screams" - there was only one other girl in this scene, so essentially whenever you hear a female scream, it's me!

I am so, so happy and excited and kind of still can't even believe I got to be on that show. Especially because I love it so damn much; it was like some crazy fantard dream. It doesn't even seem real. But it is real. And it will be viewed Friday by...

Aw shit, now I'm all nervous again. WHAT MADE ME THINK IT WAS OKAY TO GO ON NATIONAL TELEVISION?

But yeah, man. I'm... just really excited. About this and lots of other things. There are just a lot of weird cool balls in the air right now, and... neat things are gonna happen, I know that. I'm not entirely sure WHAT next, but. It's coming, and it's gonna be cool.

Because I hope you have a happy one. Regardless of the fact that Valentines' Day is a fabricated holiday concocted by the Church and perpetuated by greeting-card companies.

And I love this place and community 5ever.
(That means even more than 4ever.)

QUESTIONS BECAUSE I LIKE ALL YOU GOOFBALLS.

1) VALENTINES, MOTHERFUCKERS; DO YOU HAVE THEM? By that I mean either PERSON YOU LIKE, or SMALL PAPER REMEMBRANCES?

2) Regardless, are you doing anything fun today/tomorrow?

3) What would be the best thing ever to get for Valentines' Day? Chocolate, flowers, an albino jaguar with wings who speaks in perfect iambic pentameter?

I think I'd like the jaguar. That sounds pretty effin' cool.

SO! Totally copying the wonderful here - she's also doing Valentines' commishes! Hit her up!

Kissing or couply headshots! From now until... whenever I feel like stopping, probably the full month of February. Having some extra monies would just be nice, and hell, I can't get enough of drawing kisses or forehead-touches or various other couply things, I REALLY CAN'T, okay?

Sketch: $5


Inked/semi-shaded: $8

Not a KISS (though jfc I wouldn't mind drawing Kyle and Louis kissing, who the hell am I kidding), but it'd be that general style.


Colored: $10

(LOL are we seeing a pattern in what I like to draw, aaahaha)

Original characters are fine, fanart is fine.
Same-sex is fine (OBVIOUSLY LOL), het is fine, pretty much everything is fine since... kisses are awesome.

I use PAYPAL, note me for info if yer interested.

Commissions so far:
- Preed creepin' on Toad
- Preed creepin' on Regan
TheAlmightyBookworm (Tumblr) - TBA

I was really interested in the latest "hot topic" from #HQ on the subject of fanfiction, featuring a really lovely multimedia experience in the Bladerunner universe. I find it very refreshing when fanfiction is given the time of day beyond sophomoric, pointless, grammatically-mangled, art-devoid self-indulgence. I am a firm believer that despite the veritable wasteland of awfulness, it can be a valid form of expression and a wonderful tribute to a beloved canon, and wanted to share my response to the questions posed, and ask your opinions.


# # #


1) What would you say is the most wonderful aspect of fanfiction? What is the most dreadful?

Let's start with the worst, since it seems to be what everyone's most familiar with. The horrible, out-of-character self-indulgences. The unadulterated pornography, the terrible, illiterate garbles, the Mary-Sue self-inserts. They are horrible. They are irritating, sometimes infuriating, disrespectful to the original creations, and they are EVERYWHERE. I'd say that's the worst part about the bad fics or art - their prevalence. It's so much harder to find the good ones.

But when they're good - oh, how good they are.   I'd say the best element is catharsis. One of my favorite goals, whether in writing original fiction or fan - (Yes! I write fan fiction!) is emotional connection to the characters, and engagement of the reader. I can't tell you how liberating and therapeutic it is, to have a terrible, unresolved or painful issue in a work of fiction, maybe something that wasn't given the time or attention it deserved, glossed over in the need to get the next issue or episode out the door - taking it, and resolving it to the best of your ability. Give characters closure that they desperately need. Give READERS closure. It's incredible the fondness and affection we develop for fictional characters. If they're compelling and they resonate with us, we think about them long after we're done reading or watching. We worry about them. We wonder how they're doing. Fanfiction, when it's done correctly and respectfully, is a way of spending more time with old friends. Making their lives better, and our own.


2) When you first came across a fan fiction treatment of one of your favorite books or movies, you were:
a.) Horrified!
b.) Amused
c.) Angry!
d.) Confused
e.) Jealous that you hadn't thought of it sooner
f.) Happy to have fellow devotees of your "guilty pleasure"
g.) Inspired to start writing your own fan fiction?

Again - if it's literate, creative, and above all, respectful, I am always overjoyed. It's a show of love and appreciation for something wonderful, and shows me that I am not alone in loving it. It is NEVER a guilty pleasure, for I feel absolutely no shame for it. And yes, I'll take a healthy dollop of inspiration, please.

3) Which work of fiction, literary, film or TV, that hasn't had any treatment in fan fiction, should have some asap, in your considered opinion?

Sometimes I think my tastes run too much to the obscure. I'm a reluctant hipster that way - I don't WANT to wear the glasses, but I do! Most of the things I love, nobody has ever heard of - and therefore, have written no ficcage! And if I were to write my own, it would largely get no attention. I'd get more writing original (which I also do, avidly). I'd love to see some (good, literate, RESPECTFUL) love for lots of classic adventure games and RPGs, like the King's Quest series, Betrayal in Antara, Hotel Dusk: Room 215, films and shows like Titan: A.E., Batman: Beyond, Static Shock, GI Joe: Renegades - the list goes on.

4) Can you think of examples of fan fictions which you thought were superior to the original source material being "extended"?

I'd like to remind everyone that the expanded universes of Star Trek, Star Wars, Dungeons and Dragons, and countless other series with novel continuations, are simply fanfictions that were considered good enough to be published. Like any collection of works by different authors, the quality varies - but I can honestly say, I've loved some Star Trek novels more than actual episodes, and feel they get to the hearts and minds of the characters in a far more detailed and intimate way.

Bottom Line, Fan Fiction is:
a.) A homage
b.) Insulting graffiti
c.) Good clean fun
d.) Brilliant, career launching platform

All of the above is possible. Asking what fanfiction is is like asking what art or writing is. Is writing in general an expression of beauty, affection, emotion and ideas, or is it valueless trash? The spectrum is broad and huge. Fanfiction can be awful. It also has the capacity to capture precious essences of beloved characters, bring them to life for new adventures and experiences, and expand on the familiar to create something entirely its own.


# # #

SO.

Discuss. Feel free to share thoughts.
Answers to the above questions?
Agreeing or disagreeing is fine, hell, suggest a good fic, I don't care. Just have fun.